full of cake--birthday ponderings.

the downtown is bustling, even for a sunday. people drinking coffee or laughing over a table of mamosas and beer. brunch in the Springs. reading books and newspapers and pouring over laptops under awnings. so many big dogs here I think, peering at the half wolf crouched under a table and the mastiff like a statue a few feet away. people look up and smile, sipping soup and spreading butter on bagels. the line at Uncommon Grounds is ungodly. I walk past a pair of buskers howling that classic busker tune, and like a rolling stone I keep on rolling on with no real direction except a reasonable cup of coffee and a relaxing place to write.

I've got my bag of 'tools' and 'just in cases' slung over a shoulder and breathe it all in. Fall air is my air. I feel alive and crisp and partly sunny. Thinking, mildly. "Maybe I could get use to you, place. No guarantees, but if you keep this up we may have to talk about bringing things to the next level. I have some suspicions I'd like to investigate. Do you have Answers? I am a spinning spiral of Questions. I'm not sure, but it appears you've got some ins and outs I want to see about, some things to teach and lessons to learn... This may just mean I stick around a little longer to try and put a finger on just what is you're made of...Underneath all this surface.
I'm intrigued, How will you Unfold?"

This morning I woke up to a smiling Johanna carrying her "deliciously famous" raw food cake into the top bunk of my bed, glowing with all 23 colored candles and accompanied by the german rendition of a happy birthday song, entitled...something in german...and that signifies "good health, much luck and bountiful joyfulness on all your life's paths." The sleeping Soraya wakes to chime in from down below and I can't help but be slightly-momentarily-overcome. (No, I don't cry at everything..just almost at many things...) It was beautifully thoughtful and special to be taken in as a real member of the family, and included in this cake-for-breakfast birthday tradition. I ate until I was almost sick, took a shower, and crawled back into bed, happy and content to be drifting in and out of much needed sleep for the next few hours. Pleased with life and my being here and the genuine connection that seems to be passing through the household, I slept with a smile on my face and dreams of hula hoops and sugar plums dancing through my head...

On my "real" birthday, Saturday, I took a roadtrip with a lovely new-to-my-life someone an hour north into Adirondack Park. Here they've designed an 'EXTREME!' course in the tree tops full of lots of 'EXTREME!' obstacles to play on...a true jungle gym in the canopy... monkey bars 65 feet off the ground, leaps of faith into huge hanging nets...balancing on tight ropes and wobbly logs and acrobat bars and the whole nine yards. Needless to say, it was a lot of fun, not to mention a bit of a workout and a good old fashioned screaming laughing dose of adrenaline to get the blood pumping and endorphins flowing.

Probably one of the best parts of the day, however, was the driving there and back...past the endless array of multicolored tree tops, the mighty Adirondacks standing calmly and solidly in the distance, the slowly shifting clouds pregnant and playing with the idea of pouring. "Josh from New York" looking like some rugged model with one hand on my knee and the other on the wheel, glancing over every now and then with a silent smile and a nod that says so much. I am joyful and I am still and feel like I could go on driving like this forever, letting the music wash over me and the scenery pass me by. An intense love of the road and for people and the divinity of nature...a calming this is what I do this for. A feeling of rightness with the world in a moment floods me--a victorious stopping of time,  in-tuneness with oneness and awareness of greatness and all this guru sounding ness-ness that makes me feel I'm truly enjoying the "bountiful joy on all my life's paths." I inhale. We move forward and continue to arrive at exactly where we need to be. I complete my breath and start again.

It is true I feel fortunate to have made such solid connections "in time" for my birthday and that although I missed my home in good old Minnesota I was made to feel loved and at ease in my new home along this portion of the road. I am also so grateful to all of you that reached out to me in your own way and dropped a line--a phonecall, a letter, a message, a text, and even those one-liner facebook acknowledgements go a long way. Honestly, it means A LOT to know you're out there and that I'm crossing your mind from time to time. You are all in my heart and in my thoughts more than you know.

Thank you so much for reading, and for all the positive feedback. Its good to be heard.

Love and blessings,
Until next time

XO Kaitlin

beginnings, the launch, and risks that aren't risks

Thumbing through books on the 3rd floor of the Saratoga Springs library I come across this quote and feel those momentary tears of recognition bubble and subside within me.

 Slow me down, God, and inspire me to send my roots

down deep into the soil of life's enduring values,

so I may grow toward the stars and unfold my

destiny.

                                          ---Wilfred Peterson

Although I haven't a clue who Wilfred Peterson is, he certainly got it right. As much as the travel life sends that rush of adrenaline through me--an excitement to keep pushing onwards,  to explore the furthest reaches, to climb up every tree and wade through every river, it's important to remind myself to indeed slow down, to stop and enjoy those roses that are all around me all the time.  Life in Saratoga is enabling me to do just that, to breathe in deep and fully enjoy the ride that is this life. I feel content and at peace with my path, and that the experiences I am having, the people I'm meeting, and the things I am learning are all in line with where 'I ought to be.' It's like a take on that old, 'everything happens for a reason' except inexplicably more...somehow more real...more cosmic... more grand and wonderful and downright scientific...

A connection brought me to Saratoga, paging through an outdated ad in an old WWOOFING addendum (World Wide Opportunities on Organic Farms) I found a description for SILC, The Sophias International Learning Center.  A place that had basically been single handedly started by this woman, Johanna Sophia, and her children in upstate New York. The idea of the place was to create a space to promote all facets of happy healthy sustainable living--for people of all ages and backgrounds to come together to grow, share, learn, and coexist together and become more green and conscious beings in the pristine countryside of New Berlin, NY. Sure, I'd heard about these types of places before, but something here felt different. I immediately felt compelled to write her a long and personal email explaining my past travels and the new direction I wanted to continue my journey in--one I felt was leading me positively without a doubt towards her and her family, east to NY, and the lifestyle she was simultaneously living and promoting. 

She wrote back thrilled and explained that things hadn't exactly worked out on the farm/house in New Berlin and they had recently moved into a small apartment north in Saratoga Springs, where she was trying like mad to get some projects off the ground. I was to check out some of her stuff online, and if I was interested to come 'right on over' and get to work. There's not much space, she warned, but I could really use a helping hand as soon as possible!

Knowing I was headed in that general direction the end of October anyways, it seemed like the perfect fit for the meantime. It was quickly settled and I was off, having only a vague notion of what I was getting myself into with the Sophias. We had agreed upon a 3-week sort of trial period for my initial stay, and that we could talk about extending or adjusting ourselves into a more formal agreement if things were going well for everyone involved. One of the most valuable things I've learned in life is that you can survive almost anything for 3 weeks, and at the very least I'd be getting a 3 week crash course in eating a raw only diet, learning tons, and have a place to stay while the leaves turn pretty colors in the east.

I'm about a week in now, and so far things are going great! I always like a good challenge at adaptation, and living in a small household with two teenagers is like a bizarre twist on that shared dorm room experience I never had in college. Real trials in patience and humor and taking it all with a grain of salt, whatever that really means. Johanna herself is fabulous and we are connecting very well, like kindred spirits or soul sisters...or you know, good friends. She is an infinite source of knowledge and the little (big) bits of random information inserted into every conversation are priceless. She wasn't kidding about the work load, there is tons to do that keeps me busy; making contacts and promoting different events...classes, workshops, raw food dinners, designing flyers, writing blurbs...you  name it you got it. Assistante Extrordinaire -a thank you very much. It feels very good to be in a service-oriented phase of life, donating my time and energy to a person or cause that seems so genuinely worthy and grateful. Helping to share the load, and gaining such invaluable experience along the way.

Much to do, much to say, don't want to write too much and scare you all away...

Thank you so much for reading. I truly think it's awesome and appreciate it dearly.

Any feedback, questions, or comments are of course welcome always

Lots of love,

Kaitlin M.

A touch of the past, and moving forward.

And so now I sit logged onto this blog I haven't touched in months that feels like lifetimes, rereading my words from what feels like across a globe ago and my heart is happy and soaring. Memories can be a great deal of fun sometimes, and to go back to where I last left off instantly channels feelings of well being and love.

 So many stories and insights I have to share from those 2 months that somehow turned to 5; tales of the incredible people and places I encountered in the breathtaking lands of South America, how they both gently and firmly stole a piece of my heart and buried it away deeper and deeper, piece by piece into the culture rich earth every step I took. 

I want to tell you about being a lone tourist in Peru, and becoming a rambling vagabond in Ecuador. Or how I went from hot showers and pretty dresses to river bathing and commune living, trading and giving what was extra away, until it was just me in my trusty red dress, and maybe a bug or two in my hair. I want to explain my experiences learning the 'art of survival,' and take you dancing through the markets with me,  tambores pounding and ribbons spinning, learning how to open my heart, and to have holdsteady faith in the karmic boomerang that is Give and Take. I will go back there, with you, to the gateway of the Amazon where I met Myself and began my inner journey towards light and breath and spiritual evolution. To the makeshift tents, the riverbeds, the welcoming dirt floors and the smiles of strangers. I'd even like to humbly recount the memories of the airport in Lima where I spent too many nights, dodging guards and sporting a turban to control the lice, because hey, there's a lesson in everything, right? 

Those 5 months and the effect they had on me are too powerful not to share with those who care to listen. On my journey I was truly moved as I reconnected with Life and Nature and my version of God and the meaning of Spirit. I strengthened the muscles of body and mind, and wielding machetes, dancing with naked feet upon the seeds of hand worked soil, grew like a tree towards the stars and the moon and the life giving sun. I climbed upward, becoming lighter and more free with each form that fell away. I laughed and soared and cried with gratitude and thanks at the realization of an infinite world inside a heart, of beautiful brothers and sisters, and a loving Life all around me.

Alas, all that being said. Time waits for no...human. Life keeps on a rollin and theres just too much ground to cover to dwadle (however blissfully) in the past. I am thrilled you are reading again, and hope you will be patient as I continue writing and compiling these stories and information into a 'finalized' version in which I can share my South American experiences more completely and fluidly.

So please, excuse the gap (use you're imagination to fill it if you please) as my Dirt and Wonder adventures now resume in Saratoga Springs, NY, the beginning of my journey in the great Unknown East (Well, unknown to me at least).  I think they've got a lot more computers this time around so... we'll keep our fingers crossed for a little consistency;)

Until then,
lots of love and bless 

Kaitlin

A past post that was lost in past draft world

sometime in March, 2012 Vilcabamba, Ecuador

Whhhew. Aca, aqui, here, ahora, now... en este momento... todas las puertas estan abiertas y el rio afuera esta cantando. perfecto.

Man, has it really been so long? (so long as in the blink of an eye turtle time)

Days have become months, ("months, days")

and calendar pages keep on rolling forward (what year is it anyways..?)

It's true I've transitioned from travel life to living life, and this change (this place, these people, this magic) seems to have greatly effected my sense of time in the process. Many people here don't carry a watch, and to be asked to to play the "timekeeper"is often a slightly unpleasant task to burden someone with.

hey brother, you got the time?

The clock in the main square is always set at 10:30. It never moves, only makes noises when it pleases.

Although I'm not hustling from bus to bus or town to town beach to hostel or restaurant to market I'm still living an adventurous existence, and my cross over into Ecuador truly marked a new beginning for me. A new kind of life where money started fading and magic started happening, a new kind of internal growth and a sharpening of the instincts.

Maybe at first it was an accident, the money leaving me. Inexperienced backpacker splurges and the painful learning process of realizing when you straight up got a bum deal. But when I started putting the pieces together and could begin to see the whole, all the little and large events leading me to where I was, with who I was with, with the way I was thinking, feeling, acting, learning... I could really see it there. Purpose. Reason. Light. Even if just a quick flash vision, I could see it all as it was put in my path and gave myself a pat on the back for seeing the signs and eating up opportunities as they came. No regrets just love and laughter and the KNOWING that NO MATTER WHAT you do, NO MATTER WHAT DECISION YOU MAKE, as long as you make it with love and the intention to succeed with happiness in your heart, everything is gona work out. every little thing, is gona be alright.

.